I have been reflecting and questioning in the past months about my last relationship and the other failed relationships. Even after months of the break-up, I still tried one last time to pick up the phone. He hung up without saying a word. It has been at least a couple of months now since that phone call. His face is slowly fading away from my mind. As soon as my mind is free, he will pop-up for a little while. The only feeling that’s left is the feeling of disappointment. Why do I have this feeling?
Somehow, I thought of my grandparents that their marriage was pre-arranged. In those old days, divorce was not allowed in the Asia culture or at least in my grandparent’s marriage. They probably had fought, argued and disappointed but they never left each other. They lived up to 96 years old. My memories of my grandparents were wonderful. The happiest place that I could be because there was so much love. Even they are gone for years, I can still feel the love that they had for each other. It makes me wonder why my relationships failed. Why many relationships fall apart in these modern days when we have the choice whether to love someone or not! I have a theory. In my grandparents’ marriage, there is no ‘backdoor’ to exit like two people put in the same room, there are only two choices. One is to fight and hate each other every day with no happiness for the rest of their lives. Their other choice is to make the relationship work. Through time, love grows! I am glad my grandparents chose love! What exactly is this ‘backdoor’? To me, it is the commitment to love each other, not about the ring but every from the heart and soul! I guess I just find the answer why I have this feeling of disappointment because he never gave me his commitment while I did give mine!
“Without commitment, love will never grow deep into our hearts!
Without commitment, love will not stand the test of time!
It is only both commits to each other hearts and souls,
Love will forever last even when the bodies are gone!”